Naturally, sometimes we face problems and challenges in our relationships. Sometimes these problems can be too painful for us to bear, especially if we feel like we have become someone else’s plaything. Psychological manipulation is a behavior that all of us have faced at least once in our lives. Still, we probably don’t know what to do in these situations so that we don’t become people’s toys anymore. This is the question we will answer in this article.
What is psychological manipulation?
When we talk about dating, we use this term to describe a behavior that psychology calls “psychological manipulation. “Manipulation or psychological manipulation means exerting influence on others to achieve personal goals and objectives. By attacking other people’s mental and emotional aspects, manipulative or controlling people make them victims of their desires; they force them to behave or feel a certain way by influencing their emotions.
Manipulators usually use similar tricks and methods. Guilt, complaining, lying, flattery, projection, triangulation, denial, feigning innocence, and love bombing are common tricks used by manipulative people and usually succeed.
Examples of psychological manipulation
Someone may want to use what they have already done for you as leverage to get what they want. In this way, guilt induction is used. You might hear things like, “If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t have gotten into college. You owe me.” Or “If you can’t come, I probably won’t be able to invite anyone else.” There is no use like this.”
Sometimes, instead of solving the problem between the two of you, a person involves a third person in this dispute to stand against you and take his side. In this situation, the odds are no longer in your favor when two people are against you instead of 1. Instead, the manipulator refuses to take responsibility, and this triangulation protects him from feeling defeated.
Love bombing is another form of psychological manipulation. Love bombing is how the other party expresses more interest in you and bombards you with love beyond imagination and countless gifts. At first, he makes you depend on him with these tricks and then shows cruel behavior.
What are the signs of psychological manipulation?
Since manipulators use similar methods, there are many signs by which you will know if you are being played or not, for example:
- Manipulators know your weaknesses and learn how to exploit them emotionally.
- They pull you out of your comfort zone and into situations where you feel safe.
- They try to cut you off from your friends and loved ones and make you a loner to have more control over you.
- Manipulators convince you to give up on essential things to become more dependent on them.
- They share some truths about themselves with you and hide other facts. By doing this, they feel strong and intellectually superior.
- They use the gaslight phenomenon to make you doubt your emotions, perception, and mental health.
- They have a wicked sense of humor. With this tactic, they challenge your weaknesses, which makes you feel insecure. They feel psychologically superior by making you look bad.
- If they succeed in their manipulation, they will continue to do so for as long as possible unless you can get yourself out of this situation.
Solutions to prevent being played with and psychological manipulation
1. Know the signs
The behavior of manipulative and controlling people is often similar to each other. Be wary of overly friendly people who make empty promises or try to make you feel guilty when starting a relationship. By being aware of these similar behaviors, you can prepare to take preventive measures and get out of the trap of these people.
2. Define your boundaries
A very effective way to take back your power is to show people what behavior you do not tolerate. Define your boundaries and set expectations and needs that help you feel safe and comfortable in your relationships with others.
3. Do not make the issue personal
Psychological manipulation is hurtful, but try to internalize that the manipulator’s behavior has nothing to do with you. These behaviors are more related to the manipulative person and his inability to satisfy his needs and desire healthily.
4. Rotate the scene
Manipulators want everything for themselves. You can turn the stage and remind them that you are a human being with feelings and won’t let them ignore your feelings. For example, if he tries to say, “This is not an important matter.” If he ignores your feelings, you say, “I know you may not think this is a big deal, but I feel bad about this situation, and I think it’s unfair.” A 2018 study showed that this method could be an effective way to reduce conflict and hostility.
5. Inform your trusted person
Dealing with a manipulative and controlling person is mentally and emotionally exhausting and annoying. Talking to a close friend or family member about your situation can reduce tension and anxiety. Close friends and family members can give good advice and guide you in choosing the right way to deal with the manipulative person.
6. Get help from a counselor or therapist
Sometimes psychological manipulation is done by a relative. In this situation, it isn’t easy to cope and get help. Psychological manipulation affects your emotional health. So it is essential to find a way out of this situation. Try to get help from a counselor and psychotherapist.
last word
Being trapped by someone who wants to play with you is annoying and difficult to get out of. However, by increasing your communication skills and mastering your emotions, you can eliminate this situation and not allow others to take advantage of you. Have you ever been in such a situation? Write in the comments section how you managed to save yourself.
Warning! This article is only for educational purposes; to use it, it is necessary to consult a doctor or specialist.
