The first sign of a child’s curiosity about sex is usually the frequently asked question, “How are babies born?” as a parent, you can resort to the famous story of the storks and temporarily solve the problem or start to teach children about sexual issues, you can solve this question along with many of his future concerns at the same time. If the second path is your choice, be with us, and we will show you the way in this article.
Children of the new generation grow up earlier!
These days, when the Internet provides access to any information in less than a few seconds, don’t expect children to not be curious about sex until adulthood. Children’s eyes and ears open sooner than you think, and whether you accompany them or not, they will look for answers to their unanswered questions. It is your art to be able to use this curiosity to create safe and secure communication.
Fortunately, new resources and tools have made it easier to teach children about sex. Use everything you have and try to be a reference in the child’s mind for all information related to puberty and sexual issues so that he can honestly and without shame get all the information he needs from you.
The American National Institute of Child Health and Human Development has declared the age of puberty to be eight years old. This means it is no longer possible to wait until adolescence, and education should be started as soon as possible.
Just talking doesn’t heal a pain.
When you sit across from a child to have a severe and grown-up talk with them, the situation becomes stressful and scary for you and the child, especially if you’re going to sit and parrot general information. What is the better way? To turn every moment of everyday life into an opportunity to learn.
If your child sees a pack of tampons on the table and asks about it, instead of aggressively telling them not to touch your things, honestly explain to them about this device and its use. If this is the first time you are talking about female menstruation with your child, open up the discussion from time to time and give him more information until he is entirely familiar with this category.
Teach according to the child’s age.
The purpose of teaching sexual issues to children is to learn the anatomy of women and men and related concepts such as maturity, sexual identity, sexual desire, sexual abuse, and sexual assault. However, we should not ignore this critical issue that children’s understanding of sexual issues changes constantly during the stages of development. Therefore, the appropriate approach to teaching these issues to a 3-year-old child differs from the right approach to teaching a 13-year-old. Books, videos, and educational classes help parents have this critical conversation authoritatively and precisely according to the child’s age and level of understanding.
1. Teaching sexual issues to children up to 2 years old
Most Iranian parents do not have a good view of teaching sexual issues to children under two years old. However, early learning during this period (before the child develops language) lays the groundwork for later concepts. Start by teaching the names of the genitals and incorporate them into everyday activities. For example, while taking a bath, prepare the child’s mind to learn about health issues and vulnerable points of the body by saying words such as penis, breast, and vagina and pointing directly to each. This frank training, while conveying important information, turns the parent into a completely reliable source in the child’s mind.
2. Teaching sexual issues to children aged 2 to 5 years
In this age group, the focus of education should be on sexual boundaries and parts of the body that are allowed or not allowed to be touched by others. By playing touch games like “tickle,” teach your child how much touching is allowed and where he should react next.
Children in this age group should know that others are not allowed to touch their genitals. If you catch your curious child’s wrist while playing doctor, embrace that curiosity and turn it into a point of entry into discussing family rules and values, such as what clothing is required in different places or that they can never touch other people’s private parts.
Don’t lie when answering more complex questions, but you don’t have to tell the whole truth, either. If you want to explain how to have a baby, skip the sex education and say, “Two adults join their bodies and share sperm and egg to make a beautiful baby like you.” Reassure the child that later, you will explain more about the interaction of sperm and egg.
3. Teaching sexual issues to 6-8 year old children
A child at this age should learn to explore the digital space safely. Establish clear rules about communicating with strangers and sending her private pictures, and reassure her that if something bothers or worries her, she can feel free to share it with you. Take a step forward and talk a little about sexual abuse and the concept of rape. Children must face this unfortunate reality to understand the importance of protecting themselves or helping a friend who has been abused. Of course, how much you talk about this depends entirely on your child’s state of mind.
The following things that can be addressed in teaching sexual issues to 6 to 8-year-old children are the mechanism of sexual relations, the gender identity of men and women, and the critical point of maturity.
4. Teaching sexual issues to children aged 9 to 12
This age is full of emotional and social changes, and your children struggle with many physical and mental problems. Talk to your children about how they feel about their body changes, and constantly remind them that all these changes are entirely regular.
At this age, your child should prepare for the first menstruation and ejaculation. Explain to him that menstruation and ejaculation are signs of the body’s fertility and help the life cycle. Also, talk about sex and other sexual behaviors in more detail. For example, explain that with the onset of puberty, the intensification of sexual feelings and romantic feelings towards peers is not far from expected.
5. Teaching sexual issues to teenagers
As a teenager, when your child has a closer look at sexual issues, light the concept of “satisfaction in sexual relations” like a light in his mind. Your child should learn what to expect from his partner later, how to express his expectations, and how to protect himself from pressure and violence in the relationship. Now is the best time to learn about contraception, sexually transmitted diseases, and the importance of sexual health. Talk about healthy relationships as often as you can so that your child learns to quickly assess the risks of sex and make the best decisions in this field.
Continuity of conversation is a condition for better and deeper learning.
Teaching children about sex is an ongoing process. It is often necessary to break taboos and remind your child of essential sentences despite your unpleasant feelings. Tell him that he may accidentally come across pornographic content on the web or social media and that he can talk to you about it honestly. Remind him that talking about these issues will not make you angry and aggressive and that you can give him good information. Don’t forget that children should be curious and ask questions; This is part of the healthy process of child development. With constant dialogue, your education will be more complete, and sexual issues will be more apparent in the eyes of your child.
The last word
Parents who are not eager to teach their children about sex issues and even avoid approaching such discussions eventually bring their children into society with the background that talking about sex is an immoral taboo. Later, these people cannot talk about their sexual needs and often turn to sexual repression, while many sexual problems in adulthood can be prevented with the proper education at the right age.
As parents of the new generation, what methods do you know to teach children about sex? We look forward to hearing your valuable comments.
Warning! This article is only for educational purposes, and to use it, it is necessary to consult a doctor or specialist.
